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  • Writer's pictureRebecca Casciano

The Truth About Self-Love & Relationships

February is the month of love and a good reason to delve deeper into one of my favorite topics- self-love! February is the month of love and a good reason to delve deeper into one of my favorite topics- self-love and relationships. As a Beauty & Wellness Coach and someone who’s been on my own journey for over 25 years, I’ve learned that the relationship we have with ourselves impacts all other relationships in our lives. 

“My primary relationship is with myself- all others are mirrors of it.”  - Shakti Gawain

This is especially true when it comes to our intimate relationships. Before I met my life partner, I yearned to find “the one” who would love and accept every aspect of me. Now that we’ve been together for 11.5 years, I've learned that being in a relationship will also call you to love and accept yourself in new ways. Here’s what I’ve come to know:

Self-Love is the Foundation

A relationship can flourish when it stands on the solid ground of self-love. I've discovered that how I embody self-love sets the tone for how I give and receive love in our relationship. When I prioritize my well-being, embrace my strengths and flaws, and practice self-compassion, it becomes the foundation for building a healthy, nurturing connection with my partner.

Reflection is Key

As much as I may wish my beloved embraced every aspect of my personality, I've come to appreciate that we are one another’s mirror. When we have a disagreement, it shines light on aspects that need healing, often related to my deepest fears or insecurities. The vulnerability of someone bearing witness to your struggles is challenging, to say the least. Yet, true love mirrors not only our weakness, but our strengths as well!

Self-Love is a Continuous Journey

Being in a relationship has taught me that self-love is not a destination; it's a continuous journey. In the ebb and flow of love, I've realized the importance of evolving alongside my partner while maintaining a steadfast commitment to self-growth. This dynamic balance ensures that self-love remains an ongoing process, adapting to the changing seasons of our personal and collective growth.

Independence Strengthens the Bond

One of the most important things for a couple is finding a synergy between independence and togetherness. Embracing self-love has empowered me to maintain a sense of independence within the relationship. It's the recognition that while love is shared, each of us must nourish our personal passions, dreams, and self-care practices. In doing so, the relationship thrives as two individuals contributing their fulfilled selves to the shared journey.

As I navigate the ever-evolving landscape of self-love and intimate love, I continue to learn, adapt, and grow in new and sometimes unexpected ways. Whether you’re currently in a relationship or not, my hope is that these reflections have sparked fresh insights for you!

I'd love to hear from you—what resonated most with you? I invite you to share your thoughts in the comments below!

Are you lacking the confidence to date and ultimately find your life partner? I am here for you! Schedule a FREE Discovery Session with me now to learn how I can help you embrace your authentic beauty and find the love you desire and deserve.

1 Comment

Unknown member
Feb 02

Really needed to hear this today. It was a dark and rainy day here in Southern California and for me, self-love doesn't come as easy when I'm stuck inside all day.

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